Headphones On

i was sitting in a meeting this morning at evil-food-company-X and staring out the window when i realized i was staring at a fading blue water tower. from 18 stories up i began to count. i could see water towers for lombard, glen ellyn, wheaton, carol stream, glendale heights and more... 14 in total. 14! i'm not exactly sure what the point of sharing this is, other than it made me feel slightly more connected to the area around me and a slight sense of nostalgia. i was about 2 miles from the house i grew up in, sitting in a building whose parking lot i learned to drive in and for a second... just a second... i missed it all.

i'm not sure exactly what there was to miss... unless it was the lack of responsibility, the carefree lifestyle of my teenage years and innocence. well i suppose those are things to miss now aren't they? for another half a second, i could imagine myself living there again... giving up my public transit, indie-business-purchasing ways, buying a car and taking up residence a few miles from where i'm from. i know that's not any easier... but a yard and a garden seem like delectable ideals right now. it seems every corner i turn, i continue searching for a more peaceful lifestyle in this otherwise chaotic city. as it is i've chosen to live away from "the action"... in a quiet and calm little corner that's full of trees, single family homes and families with lil kids peddling around on tricycles.

so yeah today i've determined yet again that i have no idea what i want out of my life.